That night I had burrowed into a futon with a set of rough, thin, white sheets. I had tried everything counting sheep, breathing slowly, and pulling the cold covers above my head. I was there with my family, their laughs still echoed in my ears from the previous day. But all that noise was gone now, and I was left in the complete silence. It was morning by the time I sat up accepted sleep wasn’t coming. I could hear movement through the house, a drawer close or a door shut. Then I heard the soft ring of the doorbell and people were coming into the house. My aunt was crying and someone’s shoes were pacing back forth in the kitchen. After I could take it no longer I pulled my self up and crept down the hallway. The floor was icy cold when my bare feet touched it and the crisp morning air lingered in the house from and open window. When I reached the living room it was filled with only a few people. My grandparent’s neighbor, my aunt and uncle, my parents and some people I didn’t know. They all crowed around something so I pushed my way through and found they had circled around a white gurney. On the bed was my grandfather, his skin once rosy and warm now as pale and cold as ice. The people I didn’t know were talking to grandma and she was crying but I wasn’t listening. MY mind had blocked out everything. I was trying to remember my grandpa because I knew what these people were here for. The people grabbed the gurney and pulled it down the hallway. The squeaky wheels scratched the sideboards but grandma never lifter a finger.
My grandma served breakfast to everyone that morning, but I couldn’t taste any of it. There were eggs, pancakes, and orange juice all of those were my favorite and just seeing them would have made my mouth water. But now my eyes were keeping all the water in my body to them selves and waterfalls of sweet and salty tears ran down my cheeks. When my grandma saw that I wasn’t eating anything she pulled me aside and told me to go back to sleep. Her voice cracked and wobbled and I told her she should sleep too. She laughed and I laughed but both were fake. We both knew we weren’t getting any sleep.
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